My husband is sitting at the table with a very serious look on his face. I ask him if all is okay. He looks at me and says “I’m just wondering what it is like to be you.”Read More
The Estuary Blog
Throughout their work and lives, our staff and friends of The Estuary become inspired and do some occasional inspirational writings. We have created this blog for them to share their thoughts, writings, and feelings with you.
Please feel free to offer your comments at any time and joining us in this journey through life. You can do this by clicking the link below each article. To access previous articles, click the dates in bold on the calendar to the right.
Tuesday, Crying Again!
This morning I found my eighty-four-year-old mother sleeping with her legs hanging off one side of the bed. She has gotten much weaker and can't pull her legs up onto the bed anymore. She could last week, why not this week? She cries out in pain as I pull her to sitting position - I have to hold her back so she doesn't fall back on the bed. Everything with her is a chore - hard labor! I flinch when her pain makes her cry out. Her hip muscle has stretched from lying like that all night. I finally get her to her recliner and get some Tylenol down her throat. “Ouch, ouch, ouch, everything hurts” is the song she is constantly singing. I beg her to eat something but can only convince her to drink a little vitamin drink. So I sit down on the couch and my eyes well up with tears. I have a great urge to cry just like I cried yesterday morning. I don't know what to do and nobody else knows either. I am helpless and don't like being helpless - so I cry. I guess I am not the tough-guy I like to think I am.Read More
This is not my first rodeo into this realm of the feminist movement.
Last time we demanded that men change, declared our sexual freedom, decided to make ourselves happy instead of waiting for “HIM” to make me happy, and burned our bras. OHHH. . . the freedom we thought we had found.
It feels like as an elder in this community, I am being called upon to hold on even more tightly to the inner unity I have already found, rather than convincing others that I am right politically and socially.
It is disturbing to me to experience the violence and meanness that is so prevalent in the political world. I don’t understand the divisiveness of racism, sexism, xenophobia etc.
Last month, my life partner and best friend passed away from a journey with cancer. Words cannot describe the pain and sorrow I feel constantly. The word "lost" best describes my life at this moment and I find myself walking around in circles hoping I will wake up from this dream state and my life will go back to normal. Unfortunately, reality says otherwise and my new life does not include the beautiful man that was a part of my life for the last seven years.Read More
Before my mother died she said to me; “I wish you could stop trying to fix yourself! Why can’t you just be more like me?!”
I have a dining room cupboard filled with dishes and china from relatives who have long since died. I never fully thought about whose they were because my younger sister remembered it all.
She died six years ago.
I just returned from a family trip with my two fabulous grandsons. I listened to a lot of rap with my 14 yr old and slept with the 9 year old who sleeps in giant circles so I frequently woke with a foot or an arm in my face.
It was a delicious, precious and fun time.Read More