My husband and I were talking about the meaning and the journey of moving from external success to the internal, personal experience of significance. This is a very personal, internalized journey, individualized for each person and often requires a guide.
I was trying to explain to him how I felt/knew my own internal significance. It seems I somehow know, but found the words to describe this experience elusive and slippery.
Something like this: I know who I am, when I am Me and when I am not. Yet, I don’t have any adjectives or badges to describe this experience. I can more easily explain what I am not, and how I have changed. For example, I am no longer as concerned with whether or not I am nice, or if people like me. I like most people I meet, that’s all that matters to me.
I am freed from having to have lots of beauty, money, to have traveled to the correct places, said the right thing, or needing to learn everything possible because it is out there. There are places I will never see, experiences I will never have, things I will never learn.
My internalized significance seems to be a deep sense of spiritual satisfaction within myself, a knowing (I don’t always know what!) within myself, and just a pervading spiritual sense that my life and me have mattered.
Somewhere on my life journey I committed myself to the task of becoming fully human. When I was born I became human. That’s not what I am saying. Instead, this is a commitment to my deeply personal journey of being fully human.
I am much closer than I was ten or twenty years ago. It is this spiritual journey that gives my every breath, every moment significance.
This is my deeply spiritual, significant life.
Executive Director & Founder
The Estuary, Inc.