My mother died in 1995.
Yet her voice sounds in my mind over and over again with the same message from my childhood, adulthood and even after her death I still hear her saying, “Susan, don’t forget who you are!”
I meditated the other day, like several times. Granted I was attending a meditation immersion weekend, but that’s beside the point.
This wasn’t the first time I’ve meditated, but it was definitely the first time with a group of strangers and with a soft man voice guiding the way. That man voice was real as it was the voice of the man leading the weekend. We’ll call him Danny – mainly because that’s his name. He was awesome, by the way. He knows things. I guess that’s why all of us strangers paid lots of money to listen to both his voice and to his advice, or wisdom, rather.
Man’s a foolish creature, always at war.
Surrounded by his angels, that he chooses to ignore.
~ Nathan Bell – “Dust”
The lyrics above are of a song I recently discovered thanks to Apple Music’s “you may also like.” That feature is an angel itself. I’d probably still be listening to MC Hammer or Color Me Badd if it weren’t for modern day technology. Or Paula Abdul.
My husband is sitting at the table with a very serious look on his face. I ask him if all is okay. He looks at me and says “I’m just wondering what it is like to be you.”
We woke up this morning to a large red ring around my daughter’s belly button. Thankfully this episode was on a regular weekday instead of a Sunday. It was like God listened when I prayed for some weekend medical relief, or rather wrote all about it here. He must of forgotten, however, that we were just at the doctor yesterday for her 7 year check-up.
Before the birth of my daughters and way before my divorce, I followed my curiosity. I followed whatever peeked my interest.
I worked as a baker, a banker, an auditor, a real estate agent, a Spanish tutor, and even a flight attendant!
I felt that I could be led by my sense of adventure and curiosity because the only one that I was responsible for was me.
A very wise student of mine asked a wonderful Kabbalistic question: When is ”not-making” doing nothing? And when is it doing something?
Jason Shulman describes not making in this manner.
“Not-making is that condition in which things are simply what they are and we are not making a “secondary something” out of primary experience. We engage with reality directly."
- Jason Shulman