"If you don’t become the ocean
You’ll be seasick everyday."
Everything has me confused and irritable.
Is it politics? Upcoming Holidays? Am I working too much?
Maybe, I’m not working enough?
I have no answers.
As I travel through plush lemony woods, I trip on life’s lemons just like anyone else. Sometimes it is comically obvious I cannot see the citrus for the forest.
Recently, I have been so overwhelmed, it seems as if part of my brain is offline. I bump into furniture which I normally navigate unharmed, and I feel like I am functioning outside of the normal timeline. I strain to consider my choices in these lemony situations, and yearn to make the proverbial lemonade. However, my juice has no sweetener. I am worn to a nub, as is my partner. Although we are ‘cup half full’ people, our cup has a leak, and I feel our lives rapidly draining out of it.
I hate that I feel irritated and notice that the pictures hang crooked in my office and in my home. I wait in line at the grocery feeling none of the “goodness” of buying organic foods that others seem to be secretly smiling about. I listen to a righteous diatribe about why “my smoking is not hurting anyone but myself” and I think of that person’s children, and parents, and spouse and friends.
I am judging, critical and negative.